How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
