escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Randomize
