haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
