No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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