i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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