'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
