You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Randomize