This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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