i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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