i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
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