That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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