Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Randomize
