Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
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