what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
