my soul wont recognize me after tonight
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
