it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
He took me to the bathroom in the gay bar to "just cuddle." Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice...well...
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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