The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
