so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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