Screwed.edu
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
Randomize
