So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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