You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
