guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
