I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Randomize
