Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize