Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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