You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Randomize
