i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
