theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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