youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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