Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Randomize
