Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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