Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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