it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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