i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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