she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
