I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I think i peed on brittanys purse
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
