i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
