I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
Randomize
