did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
THERE IS A GOAT THERE IS A GOAT IN MY BED IT IS EATING MY THONG WHAT DID YOU DO
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
