Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
