FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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