So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
What a dumb baby whore.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Randomize
