We won't sleep together?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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