How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
So I just sent my ex a video snap chat of me getting head from some Venezuelan hottie with the caption I still love you. Think she'll take me back?
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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