There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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