So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
Randomize
