Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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