hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
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