508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Some people dream of being astronauts others dream of having genitalia that shines like Edward Cullen in the sun
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
