Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I had to replace her wine with red vitamin water. So if she’s alive, you can thank me
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
