I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It was like giving head to a cactus.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
