To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
